Modern feminism has been incredibly effective. It has influenced practically every part of western society and one could say that the future of female domination has already arrived. Most women would consider this a victory, but I believe it to be a harmful imbalance of power ushered in by propaganda that demonizes an entire gender and ironically results in worse outcomes for women.

At the root of the problem is the false messaging in the current feminist narrative. The movement’s arguments are based on feelings instead of facts, so its demands are often misguided and misaligned with what women really want. I suspect that many women are starting to question the feminist agenda, though this is dangerous to say out loud, so I’ll take one for the team here. The following tenets of the modern feminist movement promote a fantasy that will ultimately leave women disillusioned and dissatisfied with their lives:

Girls Can Be Anything

Feminists tell their daughters they can be anything. They tell their sons that masculinity is bad and they had better tone it down. As a result, girls are growing up to be entitled and boys feel ashamed and resentful. But let’s focus on the girls. They are encouraged to pursue careers in tech, engineering, science, and math, because their capabilities are equal to that of men, and it’s only our patriarchal society that keeps them from realizing their potential. This is a lie.

Women have many inherent talents, but not the ones that make them great in male-dominated fields such as math and science. Girls do well in high school because they’re focused hard-workers, but as they pursue advanced degrees in these fields, they run up against their limits and grow increasingly disillusioned and frustrated. We need to encourage girls to be realistic about their future and honest with themselves about the life path they truly desire, which typically includes being a mother.

Women Can Have It All

Here’s a painful fact: it is not possible for women to have a big career and be the primary caretaker of their children. A toddler is awake 70 hours per week while most big careers require about 45-60 hours of work per week. The primary caretaker is the person spending the most time with the child, so a working mother would need to cut back to part-time to be that person, and that means she is no longer competitive at work.

Career women can try to have it all by outsourcing most of the childcare, but the type of woman to have a big career (highly educated, intelligent, affluent) is the least likely to want to put her kids in someone else’s inferior hands. The helicopter tendency of millennial moms makes them especially averse to relinquishing control of their children’s upbringing, and there are too many studies at this point to deny the fact that there is no replacement for the stay-at-home mom.

So “having it all” is a pipe dream. And when women have a choice (i.e. they are married to a breadwinner), most will pick motherhood over work. That means the huge investment that career women make to climb the ladder goes to waste when they retire to become mommies. If women were realistic about the demands of motherhood and that they indeed desire babies, they could make better decisions about their education and career right from the start.

Work Now, Have Kids Later

Feminists tell women to dream big, focus on their career, and postpone motherhood, which feels empowering until women reach 35 and find themselves at a crossroads. They are just five years away from reaching the peak of their careers, but they only have five more years to have two kids two years apart if they start right now. Feminists try to resolve this dilemma by bending the rules of nature and promising women that they can put off kids until 40, or they can freeze their eggs and start at 50! And we’ve already discussed the feminist trope: you can have it all! Go ahead and pop out some kids, take the entirety of your maternal leave (you deserve more!) and pick up your career right where you left it. The trick is to ignore that pesky maternal guilt that kicks you in the gut as you rush out the door every morning at 7am waving apologies at your adorable baby as she reaches for you in tears. If men can do it, so can you! Spoiler alert: men don’t experience maternal guilt.

Feminism makes all these options sound effortless, leaving women sorely disappointed when they have to make the impossible choice between being all in at work or all in at home. I’m not going to cite all the studies that refute the empty promises women hear about delaying pregnancy, the effectiveness of IVF, and the capacity they have to do it all, but let’s just say that feminists are completely leading women astray in the area that women care about most: family. Women aren’t superheroes, they are human and therefore subject to the limits of their own biology.

Men Are The Enemy

To feminists, men are the bad guys, especially white men (which means that feminists are now racist as well as sexist). On the flip side, women can do no wrong and should not be held accountable for any attacks against said enemy, because obviously he deserved it and she is the real victim here, always and forever in perpetuity. Does this go against the basis of our entire democracy? Yes, but women deserve special treatment, so we would like to advocate that the following amendments be made to the constitution:

  1. A man does not have the right to a fair trial if a woman has made an accusation about him.
  2. Men owe women for the sins of the men before them.
  3. The patriarchy is to blame for a woman’s misdeeds, but her accomplishments are hers and hers alone.
  4. A woman’s feelings are more important than the facts.
  5. Sexual misconduct is defined as whatever a woman wants it to be.
  6. Women should be equal to men (but really, superior).
  7. The rights of men should be diminished in accordance with their increased status (ie rich white men are inherently guilty).

Women Don’t Need Men

Someone needs to sit feminists down and give them the birds and the bees talk. Oh my bad, I’m the idiot. I missed the memo that lays out the plan where women trick a diverse group of genetically superior young men to donate their sperm before we banish (murder?) them or perhaps harvest their bodies Matrix style for an infinite supply of ejaculate for generations of females to come. Don’t forget we must destroy all male embryos as well to protect our utopia from being poisoned by toxic masculinity!

All straight women will magically turn gay and everyone will get along great because we all know how sweet women can be to each other. There will definitely not be any cliques of popular girls who become bored by the company of shrill lesbians growing increasingly fat because they have completely let themselves go, and they won’t secretly start giving birth to boys that will effortlessly overthrow this civilization of women because they are ridiculously stronger than them, and ugly women won’t attempt to destroy these rogue hotties in a witch hunt that will ultimately fail, because who will build the stake upon which to burn them? Those logs are really heavy.

In a world of women, innovation will slow down without the genius of men. The economy will fail without men in the workforce to support women taking two years of maternity leave to only go back to work part-time. There will be a government sanctioned shutdown a week out of every month so women can rest during their menstrual cycle which has synced up with the entire world. Inevitably, society will devolve into a female version of “Lord of The Flies” which entails less savage brutality and more manipulation, backstabbing, and passive-aggressive cuntiness.

Did you not grow up with a sister? Were you never in a sorority? Did you not go to high school? Why would any woman want a world of only women? Men can be dangerous, but girls can be cruel. And bored girls are the meanest. Clearly, this was a Pinky and The Brain type of plot concocted by a couple of dykes that theorized that if there were no men, then every woman would become an option. Talk about sexual misconduct.

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How Modern Feminism Is Hurting Women